brian dembowczyk

Choosing the Better Investment

TLDR: As parents and ministry leaders, we invest in many good things related to our kids, but the best thing we can invest in is discipling them in a way to flourish.

Imagine that it’s May 1997, and you’re trying to get Hanson’s recent ear worm release, MMMBop, out of your mind, so you decide to look for a stock to invest $1,000 in. You could invest in an index fund in the S&P 500 or in the Nasdaq, but Microsoft sure is enticing. Conversely, there’s Apple, but you’ve heard it is near bankruptcy and you don’t know of many people with Apple computers. You have also heard about the online bookstore, Amazon, going public and selling $18 shares. You like books, but is an online bookstore really worth you investing in?

So, what would you do?

If you had invested in the S&P 500, that $1,000 would be worth about $6,000 today.

If you had invested in the Nasdaq, you’d have about $11,000 today.

Microsoft would have done much better: $24,000 today.

Then there’s Apple. That $1,000 today would be worth over $1.34 million today.

And how about Amazon? You guessed it; had you invested your $1,000 at the closing price on the day of the IPO, you’d have $1.87 million today.

No matter what you had invested in, you’d be better off today. But two of those stocks truly stand out, which is why so many of us who could have invested in either Apple or Amazon around thirty years ago, kick ourselves for not doing that.

A Sure Thing

Of course, the pain of this exercise only comes from our perfect hindsight. It would have been difficult to find reason to invest in either Apple or Amazon in 1997—they were nothing like they are today. But what if we talked about a “sure thing,” but not one that has anything to deal with stocks. I’m talking about our kids.

While God has not promised us that if we teach our kids the gospel, they will 100 percent for sure trust in Jesus for salvation and thrive spiritually, it is a maxim—a truism. God blesses our faithfulness. Conversely, while it’s not absolute that if we fail to disciple our kids that they will never trust in Jesus, we can understand how challenging it would be for them to love and follow Him. So discipling our kids isn’t an absolute sure thing, but in general it’s not far from one.

While God has not promised us that if we teach our kids the gospel, they will 100 percent for sure trust in Jesus for salvation and thrive spiritually, it is a maxim—a truism.

Choosing the Best Investment

This takes us to the question of investing. While there are many good investments we can make with our kids in mind like school, sports, travel, music, and so forth, none of those are best. Don’t misunderstand what I am saying here. I am not saying we shouldn’t invest in these activities; we can and we should. What I want us to consider, though, is a matter of good vs. best, not right vs. wrong. While these areas are good investments, the best one is discipleship. What we don’t want to happen is twenty years from now for us to look back to today and realize we skipped the “Apple stock” or “Amazon stock” in our investment portfolio with our kids.

So, what does this look like? How can we invest in what matters most? Let me parse an answer to that based on whether you are reading this as a parent or a ministry leader.

Investing as a Parent

If you’re a parent, there are three ways that you can make the best investment of the gospel in your kids. These aren’t the only three ways, mind you, but they are three critical ways.

First, invest in discipling your kids to know and trust the Bible. The Bible is foundational for what we believe and how we are to live. I don’t think this is a mystery to most parents; however, I’m not sure we tend to do the best job if instilling this deeply into our kids. We might tell them that this is so, but do we show them that it’s so?

Here’s what I mean by that. Have we explained to our kids how the Bible came into being—it’s writing and canonization when the Old Testament and New Testament were officially recognized. Have we talked with them about how the Bible was transmitted through manuscripts and translated into other languages including English? How about why we have different translations and what we are to do with differences between them and the “problem” passages? How about the one big storyline of the Bible? Key doctrines we draw from it?

These are all important discussions to have with our kids at varying depths depending on their age. But make no mistake: these aren’t conversations the church should lead in having with our kids. God gave us as parents that responsibility and privilege, with the church’s help.

Second, invest in discipling your kids to know and trust in Jesus. This is, of course, what we tend to think of when it comes to discipling, and we cannot neglect it. Discipling our kids to know and trust the Bible leads toward this. After all, Jesus is the focus of the Bible. Can we disciple our kids to know and trust Jesus without discipling about the Bible? Indeed. I think many parents do this in practice. However, I have to wonder if this is why we don’t see the desired fruit of our holistic discipleship at times. We have failed to lay a solid foundation undergirding it.

However, I have to wonder if this is why we don’t see the desired fruit of our holistic discipleship at times. We have failed to lay a solid foundation undergirding it.

Third, invest in discipling your kids to love and follow Jesus. This third area is like the first in that it seems to be neglected quite often. Sure, many parents will teach their kids how they should act, but I’m not sure if it is always tethered to following Jesus, or if it is tied closely enough to that.

Our faith is a performative faith. By that I mean that we are to do something with our faith. It’s not just what we believe for salvation, although that is surely a huge part of it. Rather, we believe so that we are saved and changed, and then we are to live that change. And what is that change? As God’s image-bearers, we are changed to be made new in the image of Christ, the perfect image of God. Put more simply, we’re made new to live like Jesus. Not His divinity, but His perfect humanity.

Our faith is a performative faith. By that I mean that we are to do something with our faith.

When we disciple our kids to identify what Christlike living looks like and to find ways to live that way in the power of the Holy Spirit, we help them develop a vibrant, deep, active faith. It moves our faith from a Sunday faith to an everyday faith. It takes a faith that is intellectual to one that is practical.

Investing as a Ministry Leader

What about if you are a ministry leader. How can we invest in our kids. Well, to a large degree it’s the same as for the parents. Those are all foci that we should build our ministries around. But there is one other critical way we can invest the best in our kids: by investing in their parents.

Here’s an exercise: take some time and tabulate the time, energy, and resources (e.g., budget) that you invest in your kids directly. That would include Sunday school, VBS, camp, and the sort.

Now, do the same for how much you invest in your parents.

What do those numbers look like? If you’re like most ministry leaders, it’s probably heavily tipped toward the kids. Some may not invest in parents at all. I think that has to change.

If God chose parents to be the primary disciplers of their kids and we know that the best opportunity kids have to flourish is when their homes flourish, doesn’t it make sense that we’d do all we can to invest in parents? Every hour we invest in parents can yield exponential fruit. For us, this is like investing in Amazon in 1997!

If God chose parents to be the primary disciplers of their kids and we know that the best opportunity kids have to flourish is when their homes flourish, doesn’t it make sense that we’d do all we can to invest in parents?

So, what does that look like? First, encourage your parents and families. Cast a compelling, Christ-centered, grace-saturated vision of what family discipleship can be. Second, equip your parents and families. Do you think your parents can disciple in the three areas discussed above? If not, train them how. Teach parents about the Bible, about the gospel, and about living like Jesus. Give them the foundation they need to pass that along to their kids.

Now, you might be thinking, “Fine. That’s well and good. But when am I supposed to do this? I’m already overloaded.” Fair. But remember what we’re talking about: good vs. best investments. What do you invest in that’s good that you can stop so you can invest in what’s best? Perhaps your kids would be better off in the long run if you offered them less so you can offer their parents more.

Perhaps your kids would be better off in the long run if you offered them less so you can offer their parents more.

Don’t Delay

If we as parents invest more intentionally and wisely in our kids while we as ministry leaders do the same, I believe we will see family discipleship flourish like never before. And when that happens, I believe we’ll see the church flourish like never before. And when that happens, I believe we’ll see our communities flourish like never before.

Sounds good doesn’t it? Then don’t delay. Start today. What steps can you take—big or small—to invest in kids?

The Armor of God Bible

TLDR: A kids Bible focused on the armor of God from Ephesians is now available.

Sometimes we can make the mistake of trying to “out cool” God. We can rely on gimmicks or what’s presently cool to engage kids (and students and adults too), thinking that without these things, kids simply won’t care about God. That’s untrue, of course. The gospel is beautiful enough, it’s amazing enough, it’s cool enough to stand alone. But that doesn’t mean we should avoid those times when something in Scripture will be cool and resonate with our kids. The spiritual armor in Ephesians 6 is on that list.

Come on. Look at this soldier on the left. Now, that’s pretty cool. And this is exactly what the Holy Spirit prompted Paul to write about and wanted us to think and feel. So let’s not shy away from it.

Here’s where we need to be careful though. We cannot use the idea and images of military armor without driving more strongly to the spiritual truths undergirding that imagery. That helmet is pretty impressive, but nowhere near as impressive as our salvation in Christ that it represents. The same is true of the breastplate—righteousness in Christ and for Christ is so much more awe-inspiring.

One of the exciting projects I have recently worked on is a kids Bible that is based on our spiritual armor. This Bible traces the themes the armor represents—truth, righteousness, the gospel of peace, faith, salvation, and the Word of God—all throughout Scripture. In five hundred brief “Armor Notes,” kids can see how these themes are at the heart of Scripture. Fifty-two devotionals focused on the themes also are provided for kids to do on their own or with their families. Book introductions, reading plans, and helpful articles are also included.

Learn more about The Armor of God Bible.

New Book Announcement

Years ago, when I first really learned about catechisms, I went out looking for one to use with my kids, but I couldn’t find the right one. While I certainly appreciate the appeal of the historic catechisms and their wording, I wanted something a little more “down to earth.” Think the living room, not the formal dining room. So I wrote one.

Fast forward to now when my kids are 19, 17, and 13. After seeing first hand the value of catechising in the home, I am thrilled that InterVarsity Press has trusted me to produce a new family discipleship resource based on a 99-question Family Catechism. Faith Foundations will release in October 2025, but it is already available for pre-order. I hope and pray this book helps your family as much as using a catechism helped mine!

preorder

Here’s the marketing copy from my friends at IVP:

Grow as a Family Together in Christ

Faith Foundations enables parents and children to dig into the essential truths of Christianity to deepen their understanding of theology and strengthen their love for Jesus. Through ninety-nine devotions for families to engage in together, this family resource introduces and explores the core areas of Christian doctrine: God the Father, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, people and sin, salvation, the Bible, Christian living, the church, and Last Things.

Theology isn’t just for scholars—it’s for everyone, and Faith Foundations makes it accessible to your family through a simple approach. With clear connections to Jesus and practical steps for living like him, this resource helps you and your children deepen your understanding of key doctrines and apply them to daily life. Each devotion includes a short catechism, a key Scripture passage, devotional text, engaging family discussion questions, a prayer response, and a hands-on family activity.

Through Faith Foundations, you and your family will gain:

A meaningful structure for family devotions.
Practical steps for parents and kids to live like Jesus in daily lives.
Fresh opportunities to learn about God and each other.
A deeper appreciation and love for doctrine.
A desire to learn even more about God and his ways.

Discipleship isn’t meant to be done alone—and it definitely isn’t just for grown-ups! Grow deep roots of faith as a family by exploring theology and living a life of faith together with Faith Foundations.

Staying in Our Lane

TLDR: Neither in ministry nor in life are we expected to be omnicompetent. We simply lack the training, experience, and skills for that. Rather, it is better that we embrace our limits and thrive in the often narrower lane God has placed us in.

I recently saw a kidmin leader reach out to a group of other kidmin leaders for advice; a parent had recently approached her for help concerning her child who was just diagnosed with ADHD. This kidmin leader has heard negative things about putting kids on meds and was looking for any input on what other options she could share with this parent.

A Quick Detour

I also recently saw a social media post where a Tesla driver was asking the car maker about adjusting the car’s programming to center the car in the lane more. Apparently, he and other drivers have experienced their self-driving cars hugging one of the lane lines instead of staying in the middle of the lane. First-world problems, right? But I found it fascinating because I tend to find everything involving self-driving cars fascinating. (One of these days, I’m going to get one of those things and really decrease my rush hour stress.) The programming and technology involved in these cars is amazing. But they still have bugs to work out. Driving in a lane isn’t good enough; it’s best to drive more in the center of the lane. Which takes us back to where we began.

We Are Not Omnicompentent

I’m sure this kidmin leader looking for guidance means well, but it’s surely concerning. Medicine and ADHD treatments are well out of the scope of most kidmin leaders, indeed, most of us in general, unless you are a physician, a therapist, or some other related specialist. And here’s the double-edged sword we must be aware of: It’s a good thing when families come to kidmin leaders for help, but we cannot make the mistake of positioning ourselves or allowing families to see us as omnicompetent.

We aren’t. We were never meant to be.

Our specialty—our focus—must remain on the gospel. When families need help with the gospel, we should be there. That’s our calling and that’s our gift to our families and the church. But when we are asked for help beyond that, we should be quick to clarify our limitations and instead help them find what they need from elsewhere. In this case, being sure that this mother is working with her doctor is a top priority. And then beyond that, depending on the situation, a licensed therapist could be called on as well. Can and should we pray with this mother? By all means! Can and should we provide counseling about her child being an image bearer beloved by God and created by Him? By all means! So, we don’t abdicate everything in a situation like this. Rather, we hold onto what is in our “lane” and we refer the rest.

Our Limits Are a Gift

We need to be honest: This can be hard. It feels good when others see us as an expert, or a wise sage in all areas of life. But we need to resist giving in to that for three reasons.

First, it’s what’s best for the other person. If we want the best for those we serve—and we surely do—then we should have no qualm about pointing them to get the best help and support they can get, and that support will often not be us. Let’s love our people enough to point them to others when needed.

Second, it’s best for us. It’s weighty enough to partner with parents to disciple children and help those parents disciple their children. Why would we ever want to add further weight to that? Lighten your load and cast off areas you were never meant to carry!

Third, it’s good for the gospel. God’s design of the church is for us to need one another. We are all to recognize our limits. None of us are enough; only Jesus is. When we are quick to acknowledge our limits and turn to others, we picture the gospel.

Joseph and His Brothers Reunite

TLDR: A guide for having a family discipleship time on Genesis 42–45; 50: based on the ACT Bible Study Method.

Act 3: God Promises Jesus

Scene 24: Joseph and His Brothers Reunite

Genesis 42:1—45:28; 50:15–21

Analyze the Passage

Step 1: Introduce the Passage

Genesis was written by Moses sometime between 1445–1405 BC to help the Israelites leaving Egypt understand their history with God. It’s one of the five books of the Law that Moses wrote, which we also call the Torah, or the Pentateuch, which means “five books.”

Today’s true story is the finish to Joseph’s story. It’s a long story with a few twists and turns, and we won’t look at it all, but in the end it leads to a wonderful conclusion for someone who endured so much hardship, but who was able to see that God used it all for his good and God’s glory. This story is in Act 3: God Promises Jesus.

Step 2: Read the Passage

Genesis 42:1—45:28; 50:15–21

Step 3: Summarize the Passage

When Jacob learned Egypt had grain during the famine, he sent his ten sons, without Benjamin, who he was afraid to lose.

When Joseph saw his brothers he recognized them but pretended not to know them and spoke harshly to them. He accused them of being spies. The brothers said they were ten of twelve brothers from Canaan and they left the youngest home.

Joseph responded that they were spies and they had to stay until one brother left and brought the youngest brother with him. He imprisoned them for three days. Then, he told them that one brother had to remain and the rest would go bring the youngest brother back.

The brothers believed they were being punished for what they had done to Joseph, but they didn’t know it was Joseph who imprisoned them. Simeon was left behind.

Joseph had their sacks full of grain and their money placed back with it. He also had them given supplies for their trip. When on the way home the brothers learned they had been given back their money, they were afraid.

They returned and told Jacob all that had happened. But Jacob was distressed, believing Joseph was gone, now Simeon was gone, and if they took Benjamin, he’d be gone too. So, he refused.

When their grain ran out, Jacob told Reuben to go buy food. But he reminded him that they couldn’t return without Benjamin. Jacob told them to take gifts to give and double the money so they could give back what they had tried to give the first time.

When they got to Egypt, Joseph had a meal prepared for the brothers. When they came into Joseph’s house, they were afraid and tried to give the money from the first time to Joseph’s main servant. But the servant said everything was fine and brought them Simeon.

When Joseph arrived, they gave the gifts and he asked how their father was. When Joseph saw Benjamin, he hurried out and and went to his room and wept.

Then, he washed his face and returned. The brothers were seated in birth order, which amazed them. Benjamin was given a portion five times larger than the others. And they all drank together.

When it came time for them to leave, Joseph had food and the money placed in their sacks again. But he also instructed for his cup to be put in Benjamin’s. After they left, Joseph had his servants chase after them and ask them why they had done wrong to him by taking his cup.

The brothers denied taking the cup and said if anyone had it, he should die and the rest become Joseph’s slaves. The servant responded that if one has the cup, he would become a slave and the rest would go free.

The sacks were searched from the oldest to the youngest, and the cup was indeed found in Benjamin’s. The brothers then tore their clothes in grief, and they all returned to Joseph’s city.

Joseph asked them why they had done this, and Judah told him that they all were now his slaves. Joseph said that only the one who tool the cup would be. But Judah explained that their elderly father loves Benjamin and that his brother was dead. Judah then told Joseph about them coming and that if they returned without Benjamin, their father would die. Instead, Judah asked that Joseph keep him and let Benjamin return to spare their father such pain.

At this, Joseph could not control himself any longer. He commanded his servants to leave and then he wept loudly and told his brothers who he was. His brothers couldn’t believe it at first. But Joseph told them not to be upset or angry with what they had done so long ago. For God used that to save their lives. Joseph knew it was ultimately God who sent him to Egypt.

Joseph then told the brothers to go to their father and tell them what happened. And then to bring him back and they would live in Egypt. There. Joseph would provide for them for the five remaining years of famine.

Joseph wept with his brothers and he kissed them. And they talked together.

When Pharaoh learned what happened, he told Joseph to have his family move to Egypt and he’d give them the best of the land. So, the brothers left, after Joseph told them not to be afraid.

When the brothers told Jacob that Joseph was alive, he was stunned. Then he said he would go see Joseph before he died.

The family returned to Egypt and reunited with Joseph. Then, in time, Jacob did die. But when that happened, the brothers became afraid, worried that Joseph had bore a grudge against them and would repay them now. So they sent word to Joseph that before Jacob died, he had given instructions for Joseph to forgive his brothers for their sin. Then, they went and fell at Joseph’s feet.

Joseph told them not to be afraid. What they meant as harm, God used for good. Then Joseph comforted them.

Step 4: Interrogate the Passage

Questions you and your family ask might include:

Why did Joseph pretend to be a stranger?
Why didn’t the brothers recognize Joseph?
Why did Joseph speak harshly to them and accuse them of being spies?
Why did Joseph test them by having them bring Benjamin?
Why did Joseph change from one brother going while the rest remained prisoners to one brother staying?
Why was Simeon chosen to stay?
Why did Joseph give their money back?
Did Joseph’s household servant believe in God, the way he explained that God had given them their money back?
Why did Joseph seat the brothers by age?
Why did Benjamin get a larger portion of the meal?
Why did Joseph have his cup put in Benjamin’s sack?
Why was Joseph unable to control himself any longer after Judah asked to stay in Benjamin’s place?
Why did Joseph tell the brothers not to be overcome by fear as they left?
Did Jacob really give the final instructions to Joseph or did the brothers make that up?

Step 5: Wonder about the Passage

Wonder statements you and your family make might include:

I wonder if the ten brothers felt bitterness toward Benjamin for being the favorite, like they had toward Joseph.
I wonder if Joseph had a plan from the beginning of all that he would do with his brothers.
I wonder why the brothers connected what was happening to them to what they did to Joseph.
I wonder how Simeon felt being left as a prisoner all that time.
I wonder how Joseph had Simeon treated during that time.
I wonder what the reunion with Simeon was like.
I wonder why Joseph cried when he saw Benjamin, but he didn’t earlier when he had seen his other brothers.
I wonder how the brothers felt when they learned it was Joseph.
I wonder what Joseph and his brothers talked about.

Connect the Passage to Christ

Step 6: Find the World in Front of Text

In the middle of a story filled with reminders of how the world is broken by sin, today’s story gives us a glimpse of how God wants us to live. It seems that Joseph wanted to test his brothers, to see if they had changed over the years, and they showed that they had. Before, they wanted to kill a favored son; now they were willing to sacrifice themselves for one.

But even before they could prove themselves to Joseph, we see signs of the amazing level of love and forgiveness he showed to them. He could have had them thrown in prison immediately. He could have had them killed. But he didn’t. He gave them back their money—a sign of his love for them—and treated them well. Then, when he finally revealed himself to them, he was clear that he forgave them and understood that God used what they had done for good. He did not back away from calling what they had done wrong and evil, but he accepted it as a path to God preserving their lives.

In this way, we see an example of the love and forgiveness we should extend to others. People will wrong us in big ways and small ways. God wants us to reject anger and bitterness and revenge and hold onto love and forgiveness. There is a time and place for justice, for sure, but our primary concern should be to love others who wrong us to show them Jesus’ love and to forgiven them, whether they deserve it or not.

Step 7: Find the World of Jesus of the Text

Joseph’s love and forgiveness is impressive, but it is nothing compared to the love and forgiveness of Jesus. In fact, the story of Joseph points us to Jesus. Each was a beloved son betrayed by his family. Each endured great hardships even though they were innocent. And each brought life from their hardships—Joseph physical life in a famine and Jesus spiritual life because of sin. Jesus is the greater Joseph, bringing life and restoring a shattered family through his sacrifice, his love, and the forgiveness he provides.

Translate It to Your Context

Step 8: Connect the World of Jesus of the Text to Your World

Who do you need to forgive? Who has wronged you in a big way or a small way that you can truly forgive? How can you let that person know they are forgiven? Who might you ask to forgive you for something you’ve done wrong?

Who can you show the love of Jesus to this week? What are some ways you can love your family, friends, neighbors, and even strangers with the amazing and powerful love of Jesus?

This will wrap up this walk through Genesis using the ACT Bible Study Method, at least for now. I hope it has given you an idea of how to use this method in the home and encouraged you to give it a try!

Learn more about this family discipleship method here.

Joseph in the Palace

TLDR: A guide for having a family discipleship time on Genesis 41 based on the ACT Bible Study Method.

Act 3: God Promises Jesus

Scene 23: Joseph in the Palace

Genesis 41:1–57

Analyze the Passage

Step 1: Introduce the Passage

Today’s true story is a turning point in Joseph’s story. After so much wrong that was done to him, he goes from the prison to the palace to become Pharaoh’s second in command. It’s an amazing rise from as low as one can go to so far high up in one of the most powerful countries in the world at the time. And it was all God’s doing. This story is in Act 3: God Promises Jesus.

Step 2: Read the Passage

Genesis 41:1–57

Step 3: Summarize the Passage

Two years after the cupbearer’s dream, Pharaoh had one. He was standing by the Nile and saw seven good cows. Then he saw seven skinny, bad cows. The bad cows ate the good ones.

Pharaoh then had a second dream. There were seven healthy heads of grain and seven unhealthy ones. The unhealthy ones swallowed the healthy ones.

In the morning, Pharaoh called all his diviners and wise men but no one could tell him what his dreams meant. Then the cupbearer remembered Joseph. He told Pharaoh what had happened with Joseph and Pharaoh called for Joseph.

Joseph was released from prison and cleaned up. Pharaoh said he heard Joseph could interpret dreams, but Joseph said it was not him, but God who could. So, Pharaoh told Joseph about his dreams.

Then Joseph explained that God is showing Pharaoh what he is about to do. Both dreams mean the same. Seven good years were coming that would be followed by seven years of famine, a famine that would devastate the land.

Joseph then continued by making a suggestion that Pharaoh should appoint a wise man to appoint officials to collect 1/5 of the produce for the seven good years and store this grain. This would then provide food for the seven years of famine.

This made sense to Pharaoh, so he appointed Joseph as that leader. Joseph would be second only to Pharaoh.

Pharaoh put his ring on Joseph’s finger and clothed him with fine clothing. Then the people kneeled before Joseph. Joseph was given a wife too.

All this happened when Joseph was 30 years old. And Joseph did as he had suggested, saving up grain for seven years.

Joseph had two sons before the famine. Both of their names revealed that Joseph had forgotten all his troubles and recognized God had blessed him.

Then, the famine came and Joseph used the store grain to feed the people. And people from outside of Egypt came there to buy grain too.

Step 4: Interrogate the Passage

Questions you and your family ask might include:

Was Joseph asked for advice after interpreting the dreams or did he offer that on his own?
Was it uncommon for a non-Egyptian to be placed into such a high position?

Step 5: Wonder about the Passage

Wonder statements you and your family make might include:

I wonder how badly the cupbearer felt at having forgotten Joseph.
I wonder if Joseph was nervous or afraid before Pharaoh.
I wonder if Joseph’s advice was given hoping Pharaoh would make him that leader.
I wonder what it was like for Joseph to go from the prison to second in command in one day.

Connect the Passage to Christ

Step 6: Find the World in Front of Text

Once again, the larger story around Joseph reminds us of how the world is broken. Imprisonment and famine were not part of God’s design. But once again, we see God in the middle of the story, providing hope for those who seek to honor him. That’s one thing we cannot miss about this story: how often Joseph refers to God. He was quick to explain God interprets dreams, giving him the credit instead of taking it for himself. And he was just as quick to explain the abundance and famine is what God was going to do and how God had given Pharaoh his dreams. Pharaoh didn’t miss this. Joseph also recognized what God had done when he named his two sons. Joseph knew that God had brought good from all his troubles.

In this, we see that Joseph is relying on God, which is probably why Joseph was able to do something impressive in this story—something that isn’t said in the text, but its absence cannot be missed. When Joseph became second in charge of the land, he could have sought to punish the cupbearer for forgetting him. But he didn’t. It seems that Joseph forgave the cupbearer, even if his forgetfulness had caused Joseph to stay in prison for two more years. But, based on Joseph’s statements when he named his sons, it seems Joseph understood that he was released in God’s timing. Who knows if Pharaoh would have cared two years earlier? God was moving and he was moving in his perfect time.

Step 7: Find the World of Jesus of the Text

Joseph gives us a hint of how God wants us to live with forgiveness. Joseph was wronged time and time again, but he also showed the ability to forgive time and time again. He didn’t go after the cupbearer, or even Potiphar and his wife, as he might have been allowed to do by Pharaoh. Instead, it seems he forgave. And we’ll see him do the same next time when Joseph is restored with his brothers. In this, Joseph points to Jesus, the one who provided forgiveness of our sins and who suffered and died for us, wrongly crucified on our behalf.

Translate It to Your Context

Step 8: Connect the World of Jesus of the Text to Your World

NEXT: Act 3: God Promises Jesus; Scene 24: Joseph and His Brothers Reunite (Genesis 42:1—45:28; 50:15–21)

Learn more about this family discipleship method here.

Joseph in Prison

TLDR: A guide for having a family discipleship time on Genesis 39–40 based on the ACT Bible Study Method.

Act 3: God Promises Jesus

Scene 22: Joseph in Prison

Genesis 39:21—40:23

Analyze the Passage

Step 1: Introduce the Passage

Today’s true story is one more that shows how difficult of a time Joseph had early in his life. He began as a favored son, then it was downhill from there as his brothers nearly killed him, but then sold him into slavery. Then, after doing nothing wrong, he was thrown into prison. And that’s where we pick up Joseph’s story today. This story is in Act 3: God Promises Jesus.

Step 2: Read the Passage

Genesis 39:21—40:23

Step 3: Summarize the Passage

Even when Joseph was in prison, God was with him and continued to bless him. In time, Joseph became head over all the other prisoners.

Then, the Pharaoh’s cupbearer and baker made him unhappy, so he had them thrown into prison where Joseph was. Joseph was appointed to be their attendant.

One night, both the cupbearer and the baker had a dream. When Joseph saw them the next morning, he noticed they looked depressed and they told him it was because no one could tell them what their dreams meant. Joseph told them that God can provide an interpretation and asked them to tell him their dreams.

The cupbearer told him that in his dream, a vine grew with three branches and it budded into having grapes. Pharaoh’s cup was in the cupbearer’s hand so he squeezed the grapes and gave it to Pharaoh.

Joseph told him the dream meant that in three days, he would be restored as Pharaoh’s cupbearer. Then, Joseph asked that when that happened, that the cupbearer would speak favorably of Joseph to Pharaoh so that he might be freed.

Then the baker told his dream. In his, he saw three baskets of bread on his head. But the birds came and ate from the baskets.

Joseph told him that the dream meant that in three days, Pharaoh would have the baker beheaded.

Three days later, it was Pharaoh’s birthday and he gave a feast. He restored the cupbearer and executed the baker just as Joseph had said. But the cupbearer forget Joseph.

Step 4: Interrogate the Passage

Questions you and your family ask might include:

What made Joseph successful in prison?
Did Joseph know God could use him to interpret dreams before this?
Why didn’t the cupbearer remember Joseph?

Step 5: Wonder about the Passage

Wonder statements you and your family make might include:

I wonder if Joseph was tempted to become bitter at this point.
I wonder what the cupbearer and baker did to make Pharaoh angry.
I wonder how hopeful Joseph became when he knew the cupbearer would go before Pharaoh in just three days.
I wonder if it was difficult to tell the baker about his dream.
I wonder how long it took for Joseph to give up hope after the cupbearer was released.

Connect the Passage to Christ

Step 6: Find the World in Front of Text

This account is similar to ch. 39, where we see God bless and use Joseph, even in a difficult situation. But we also see Joseph directly trusting in God, when he asked to hear the dreams to interpret them. Before this, we read that God blessed Joseph and we saw Joseph did not want to sin against God, but here is where we see a hint of Joseph’s relationship with God. And it was likely this relationship that enabled Joseph to live as God wanted him to live—with ongoing humility and obedience.

God did not design this world to include brothers betraying a brother, slavery, lying, and imprisonment. But even as the world around Joseph was pretty much all it shouldn’t be, Joseph continued to live as it should be. And once again, we are given a snapshot of how we too can live in a broken world.

Step 7: Find the World of Jesus of the Text

Joseph’s humility and obedience point toward Jesus’ greater humility and obedience. Joseph was betrayed by his brothers and wrongly imprisoned, but held onto humility and obedience. Jesus was betrayed by his brothers and wrongly crucified, but he too held onto perfect humility and obedience.

Translate It to Your Context

Step 8: Connect the World of Jesus of the Text to Your World

How can you be especially humble this week? Remember, humility is not thinking poorly of yourself; it is thinking more highly of God and others. It is putting God first, others second, and yourself third. What are ways that you can display humility with your friends, family, and others to show them Jesus?

How can you obey God this week, in big ways and small ways, so that people might see Jesus in you? Think about all the places you will be this week and what you will do. How can you obey God and people he has placed in authority with joy?

NEXT: Act 3: God Promises Jesus; Scene 23: Joseph in the Palace (Genesis 41:1–57)

Learn more about this family discipleship method here.

Joseph in Potiphar’s House

TLDR: A guide for having a family discipleship time on Genesis 39 based on the ACT Bible Study Method.

Act 3: God Promises Jesus

Scene 21: Joseph in Potiphar’s House

Genesis 39:1–20

Analyze the Passage

Step 1: Introduce the Passage

Today’s true story continues the sad story of Joseph. But this sad story won’t stay sad. It gets much better later, but even here, we see that God has not forsaken Joseph. This story is in Act 3: God Promises Jesus.

Step 2: Read the Passage

Genesis 39:1–20

Step 3: Summarize the Passage

When Joseph was brought to Egypt, he became a slave in the house of a man named Potiphar, who was one of Pharaoh’s officials. God was with Joseph and blessed him and made him successful in Potiphar’s home. In time, Joseph became Potiphar’s personal attendant. Joseph was put in charge over everything in the house, and God blessed Joseph’s work.

Because Joseph was handsome, Potiphar’s wife noticed him and wanted Joseph to sin with her, and behave as if they were married. But Joseph refused, saying Potiphar has trusted him with so much; how could do evil and sin against God? This continued day after day.

Then, one day when they were alone, Potiphar’s wife grabbed Joseph and tried to force herself upon him. But Joseph ran away, leaving his outer garment behind. Then, Potiphar’s wife called for the other servants to come, showed the garment, and claimed Joseph had attacked her.

She laid aside the garment, and when Potiphar returned, she told him the same story. When Potiphar heard this, he was quite angry and had Joseph thrown into prison, where the king’s prisoners were kept.

Step 4: Interrogate the Passage

Questions you and your family ask might include:

What made Joseph successful in Potiphar’s house.
Did Potiphar know it was God who was blessing Joseph and thus himself?
Why didn’t Joseph tell Potiphar what his wife was trying to do?

Step 5: Wonder about the Passage

Wonder statements you and your family make might include:

I wonder if Joseph was happy in Potiphar’s house.
I wonder if Joseph knew it was God who was blessing him.
I wonder if Joseph tried to avoid Potiphar’s wife.
I wonder if Potiphar thought about having Joseph killed.
I wonder how Joseph felt about all that had happened, considering he was trying to do what was right but was still punished.

Connect the Passage to Christ

Step 6: Find the World in Front of Text

In this account, we see the continued downward trajectory of Joseph’s life. He went from favored son, to being betrayed by his brothers and sold into slavery, to being thrown into a prison. But at the same time, we see that God was with him, even in these trying times, and that God was blessing him. While we won’t see why this all happened to Joseph for a little while longer, when we see the larger story, we know that God actually brought tremendous good from all this. God was using hard, painful things to bring about something very good.

For Joseph’s part, we see him live in a way that God wants us to live. Joseph maintained deep humility, when he could have bowed his back in anger and resentment. Instead of rebelling and resisting, he humbly sought to serve the person who wrongly was enslaving him, and then continued in this humble posture by refusing the wife’s advances.

We also see Joseph living with impressive obedience. Again, instead of doing the least possible to keep alive, he seemed to go all out in his work as a slave. And, when the wife tried to get Joseph to sin, he refused, standing unwavering in his obedience to his earthly master and more important to God.

Step 7: Find the World of Jesus of the Text

While Joseph gives us a wonderful picture of how we too can and should live in humility and obedience, even when life is “unfair” or difficult, we must remember that he is actually giving us a picture of a better example—the best example—of these traits: Jesus. Jesus, of course came to earth in complete humility and while he was on earth, he lived with others humbly, not ruling over them as he had the right to do. And he also sought to obey the Father completely while on earth. From Joseph, and more importantly from Jesus, we see what God wants from us in these two areas.

Translate It to Your Context

Step 8: Connect the World of Jesus of the Text to Your World

NEXT: Act 3: God Promises Jesus; Scene 22: Joseph in Prison (Genesis 39:21—40:23)

Learn more about this family discipleship method here.

It’s a Major Award!

TLDR: Christianity Today named Family Discipleship that Works as a finalist in the “Marriage, Family, and Singleness” category for 2024 book of the year.

It’s December, which means that Thanksgiving is over and we are into Christmas season in full. And one of the traditions many of us have is watching the classic movie, “A Christmas Story.” One of the many memorable and quotable scenes in that film is when The Old Man receives the infamous leg lamp and declares, “It’s a major award!” Well, from now on, I have the privilege of declaring that about my book, Family Discipleship that Works, only with a few caveats.

This morning I received word that my book was a finalist in the “Marriage, Family, and Singleness” category for Christianity Today’s 2024 book of the year. That basically means that Family Discipleship that Works didn’t win that category or come in second and earn the award of merit. However, I’ll take a tie for the bronze medal and call it a “major award.” Truly, though, of all the books published in this category, to have it make that short list is an incredible honor.

Here’s the blurb about my book from the online article:

This book is an accessible, readable resource for families seeking practical ideas about engaging in discipleship together. It has deep theological roots, along with a variety of good stories to make the lessons stick. I enjoyed laughing along with the author and sighing at anecdotes that brought back memories of when my own kids were growing. After finishing the book, I happily gave it to my youngest brother, whose own “littles” are still young. —Jennifer Ripley, psychology professor at Regent University

By the way, Jennifer Ripley is one of the editors of a fantastic and important book Ministering to Families in Crisis that I consider a must-read for those in kids, student, and family ministry.

This book was born out of my PhD dissertation at Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. Even then, as the thesis and ideas were coming into focus, I had an idea that it could become a trade book that could truly help parents in this important act of discipling in the home. With this recognition today, I hope and pray that the book makes its way into the hands of more parents who might find comfort, encouragement, and hope within it.

Joseph Is Wronged by His Brothers

TLDR: A guide for having a family discipleship time on Genesis 37 based on the ACT Bible Study Method.

Act 3: God Promises Jesus

Scene 20: Joseph Is Wronged by His Brothers

Genesis 37:1–36

Analyze the Passage

Step 1: Introduce the Passage

Today’s true story shifts focus from Jacob to his sons, namely Joseph. The rest of Genesis will follow Joseph through quite a journey, and end with God’s people being in a surprising place: Egypt. This story is in Act 3: God Promises Jesus.

Step 2: Read the Passage

Genesis 37:1–36

Step 3: Summarize the Passage

When Joseph was seventeen, he was watching the flocks with his brothers, and he brought a bad report about them to their father.

Israel loved Joseph more than all his sons and he gave him a special tunic. This made the brothers jealous and they hated Joseph and weren’t kind to him.

Then Joseph had a dream that they were binding sheaves and his sheaf rose up and the others bowed to it. His brothers asked if he really thought he would rule over them and they hated him more.

Then Joseph had a second dream where the sun, moon, and eleven stars bowed to him. This time, Israel joined in asking if Joseph really thought that he, his mother, and his brothers would bow to him. His brothers grew more jealous but his father remembered this.

When his brothers went to graze the flocks, Israel sent Joseph to check on them. As Joseph approached his brothers, they saw him far off and plotted to kill him. But Reuben convinced them not to do that, but to throw him into a pit instead. And that’s what they did.

Then, when the brothers sat down to eat, they saw some traders coming so Judah said they should sell Joseph to them. The brothers sold Joseph for 20 pieces of silver.

The brothers then took Joseph’s special tunic and tore it and dipped it in a goat’s blood. They took it to their father and said they found it. Jacob tore his clothes in grief, thinking Joseph had been killed by an animal.

Meanwhile, the traders sold Joseph to Potiphar in Egypt.

Step 4: Interrogate the Passage

Questions you and your family ask might include:

Why does the passage go back and forth between using Jacob and Israel?
Did Jacob know that Joseph’s brothers hated Joseph?
Was it foolish for Joseph to tell his family about his two dreams?
Why did Jacob want Joseph to report on his brothers out in the field?
Was it significant that Joseph couldn’t find his brothers in Shechem but rather in Dothan?
Why did Reuben want to spare Joseph? Was he the only one?
Why did Judah want to sell Joseph? Was it solely for money or was their some level of compassion?
Where had Reuben gone?
What did Reuben mean by “where can I go?”

Step 5: Wonder about the Passage

Wonder statements you and your family make might include:

I wonder what Joseph’s bad report was about.
I wonder why Jacob hadn’t learned how harmful favoritism is this point.
I wonder if Joseph knew he was making his family angry.
I wonder which brother was first to suggest killing him.
I wonder what the scene was like when the brothers attacked Joseph.
I wonder how the brothers could sit down and eat with Joseph in a pit.
I wonder if God provided the caravan of traders.
I wonder what the brothers felt like watching their father grieve because of their actions and lies.

Connect the Passage to Christ

Step 6: Find the World in Front of Text

In the last story, we saw a bright spot in the family God had called to form a new nation out of. Forgiveness seemed to define Jacob and Esau’s reunion. That was likely in part because of Esau, but also perhaps because of Jacob’s encounter with the mysterious man (God?) with whom he wrestled. It seems that things were set up for a change in the right direction. But here, just like that, things take another turn in the wrong direction. Once again we see a family in strife and sin.

It begins with favoritism once again rearing its ugly head. This sin seems to be deeply imbedded in this family’s DNA. Then, we have to wonder about Joseph’s wisdom and maturity. While we cannot be sure, it seems that it might not have been a good thing for him to tell his family about his dreams. In light of that, there seemed to be a lack of awareness in this family—did Jacob not see the brothers hating Joseph? Did he not understand the foolishness of sending Joseph to check on them? Did Joseph not understand that his brothers despised him?

All of this leads to what we know for sure: the brothers sinned against Joseph. Even if it was wrong that their father favored Joseph and even if Joseph might not have been self-aware, it was wholly their sin for wanting to kill Joseph. Selling him was not as severe, but just as sinful. And then to lie to their father and lead him to believe Joseph was dead was like murder.

In this, once again we see evidence of a world very much unlike God’s design. People aren’t supposed to do these things, let alone family. Families are to be bathed in love, gentleness, compassion, and forgiveness. We see nothing but the opposite of that in this account.

Step 7: Find the World of Jesus of the Text

It’s striking that Joseph’s own brothers failed to extend compassion and forgiveness to him. That gives us quite a contrast with Jesus. When his brothers (the Jews) sinned against him and called for his crucifixion, Jesus responded with compassion and forgiveness, showing us the better way.

Furthermore, we can’t miss how Joseph’s “death” brought sorrow to his father, but that sorrow, while lasting many years, wasn’t forever. In time, Jacob would learn that Joseph was still alive—a “resurrection” so to speak. In a greater way, Jesus truly died, laying down his life for sin, and his death indeed brought sorrow for a moment. But on the third day, Jesus rose from the dead, defeating sin and death and bringing his Father great glory.

Translate It to Your Context

Step 8: Connect the World of Jesus of the Text to Your World

How can you show others compassion this week? How can not only care about others, but act on that care by doing whatever you can for them, especially if they are in need. What can you do with your time, money, and possessions to help others in need?

NEXT: Act 3: God Promises Jesus; Scene 21: Joseph in Potiphar’s House (Genesis 39:1–20)

Learn more about this family discipleship method here.