TLDR: Look for my newest book published by IVP soon that suggests a better way for families to disciple our kids in the home.
I intended to earn a Ph.D. in theology at Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. God was kind enough to have a better plan. When I was told that if I pursued a Ph.D. in ministry instead, I’d be halfway done because of my D.Min., it didn’t take much convincing. So I signed up.
When it came to thinking about a dissertation topic, I knew I wanted to do something about family discipleship. I wasn’t sure exactly what though. My initial research question that got the ball rolling was whether Sunday school had steamrolled discipleship in the American home when that ministry began in the late 1700s. My thinking was that we could see where things went wrong back then and course correct if that was indeed what happened, or learn long-forgotten lessons about how the church and home are supposed to work together in discipling kids if that was prioritized then.
A Shocking Discovery
As I began researching, I wasn’t finding much of an answer to that question, but I started noticing some other fascinating patterns—namely that the battle between the church and home goes way back farther than we might think. I started to see quote after quote through the generations saying what is said today: parents are failing to disciple in the home. It became evident that there has never been a generation of parents in America who discipled in the home well. Never. Not even the Puritans.
So that discovery shifted my dissertation in a different direction. If we’ve never discipled well, then we need a new approach. An approach that is faithful to the Scriptures, but that doesn’t try to reinvent the wheel—a wheel that has been wobbly at best all along anyway.
Finding the Right Keys
As I continued exploring family discipleship throughout American history and evaluating family discipleship books and resources, a few notable “keys” to family discipleship rose to the surface.
First, one area that is often lacking in discipleship is identity. We talk a lot about the gospel (and rightly so) and quite a bit about behavior (although often through the wrong lens), but rarely do we focus on identity. At best, it’s a side note. But it’s a major part of the gospel.
Second, in light of identity, almost no mention is made of what it means that we are made in God’s image and, when we trust in Jesus, we are made new in him. In Christ is foundational to Paul’s theology, as it should be for us too.
Third, while behavior is often covered, it is rarely, if ever, addressed through the lens of imitating Jesus, the perfect image of God. While the dots of Jesus and our behavior are often noticed, they are rarely connected, at least not clearly.
Putting it All Together
My connective thread of these big ideas was borrowed from a different field of theology and ministry—from seeing the Bible as a drama. In the second half of the twentieth century, a small group of theologians began exploring the idea of what has been called the theodrama, that the Bible is a depiction of God’s actions with the intention of us continuing on as actors ourselves.
So, what’s in store in this book? The suggestion that we disciple our kids through that dramatic lens—seeing Scripture as a “script” of sorts that we use to learn the role God has given us to play as his image-bearers by looking at the perfect image of God, Jesus. We look to Jesus first for salvation, of course, but then for how we are to live day-in and day-out. We look to Jesus to see what a perfect human is to live like and then we imitate him through improvising his perfect human character traits (e.g., love and humility) in our unique setting. Our discipleship begins with that goal in mind—that we are helping coach our kids of what their daily living should look like.
That dissertation and this book have been a labor of deep love for me. I am praying that God uses this new book to encourage and equip parents to be the first generation in American history who thrived in this critical ministry.
I’m not sure when this book is slated to release, but look for it perhaps in late 2024 or early 2025. I’ll keep you posted.
brian dembowczyk 